They say we appreciate more what we don’t have.
Living in cities close to the mountains most of my life, my wish to live by the sea was increasing year after year. I love nature in all its shapes and forms, and I do appreciate the daily view of the mountains too. Sometimes though, I wished so badly to be able to transport myself to the seaside, in an instant. No matter what day, month or season it would be. I was fortunate enough to be able to live for almost two years close to the sea, in a house with a sea view. Boy, how I enjoyed it! The sea air, the waves, the blue water, and the seagulls flying around felt magical. There were also times when strong winds were making it impossible to be outside. Or I would skip the daily walk by the seaside knowing that later on or the next day I will have opportunities to walk. With the time passing by, I got accustomed with the surroundings. I still loved everything around me but I started to act like there was always tomorrow.… Until one day when I had to move.
By then it was too late to make it up for all the things I didn't do while I was still there. I didn’t feel too sad though as I thought that the two years would have been enough to fulfill my wish. I waved the sea a goodbye and went back to my dear mountains. I was fine, my life moved on. Yet, I felt very soon that something was indeed missing.
Day in day out I felt I was missing something yet I couldn't put my finger on as to what I was missing. Then one fine morning I realized that I missed my daily walk by the sea, alone with my thoughts with the breeze gently caressing my hair. I missed even the moments when the weather condition wasn't so pleasant. I remembered how I enjoyed watching the agitated sea from indoor; in fact not only enjoyed, I was amazed by it. Yes, the mountains are magnificent and I always get impressed admiring them. I believe I couldn’t live without them either. Still, their vicinity couldn't fill the part that was now empty. I felt that the sea was calling me day and night. At first with just a soft whisper, then louder and louder.
I heard the call. But I was shouting out within “It is not possible now. You have lived there for two years, many people don't even get such a chance, so, be quiet now.” It didn’t help though. Soon I was left without arguments. During my walks, I was looking at the mountains and telling them: “You are beautiful but you aren’t enough.” My mood was gradually influenced by this strong urge. I couldn't function properly anymore. I had to do something. I had to go to the seaside, even that being for only one day.
This urge came around the peak of the season, meaning the possibility of almost no vacancies for accommodation and excessive prices. It was most of a no-no at first. But I had to persist to satisfy the urge and find ways within my possibilities. My wish was too strong to ignore it. The feeling that I had, seemed equal to when you miss badly someone you love and you are not at peace until you see them. It wasn't easy but I made the impossible possible. I listened to my wish, and a few days later I was where I wanted to be. At the seaside. Just me and the sea. I was where I belonged to be in that exact moment. I was then relaxed and not anymore restless. I was in the place that was so persistently calling my name. I felt relieved, happy and full of life. I was grateful to the universal power that made my wish heard and pushed me to follow my desire. It made me believe that things that were seemingly impossible are possible to be achieved. At the same time, I was grateful for one more thing, for the simple fact of being there. I felt the gratitude in every moment and everything I was doing so that when I went back I felt that I lived the given time at the sea at the fullest.
With the circumstances we are in the given time and place, our mind will often tell us that certain things are impossible to attend and achieve. Despite any obvious impediments we need to sharpen our hearing and listen to the calls for anything that is there for us. Listen to your internal voice for apparently not-possible-to-come-true-at-present desire and don’t stop until you have it; and as often as you need it for as long as it is necessary. When you do achieve, allow yourself to enjoy, let the shooting feelings of excitement charge your batteries, breathe in the wonderful scent of your reached ‘need’, and smile. Life would be beautiful again.
Yes, we may appreciate having more of something that we don't have anymore, but if we are offered a chance to have that thing again, I hope we will be smarter. And here I am talking about things that we earnestly need. Things that without which we would not feel complete. Things that are call-of the-heart such as a regular dose of the sea, a hike in the mountains, time spend with our partners, parents, friends, pets etc. Everyone should know what is their ‘call of the heart’. Only when we have everything in place we feel complete. It’s like constructing a puzzle. When we miss a piece, the puzzle it’s incomplete. When the missing piece falls in right place at right time, we feel overwhelming joy.
With a clear awareness of living in the present moment and feelings of gratitude, we may manage to appreciate what we have while we have as well cherished the sweet memories of what was in the past, without feeling incomplete. Fulfilling my urge did three important things for me: it improved my mood, it gave me the hope for many other great things I wanted to do and thought I couldn't, and made me appreciate more what I have when I have it.
Today I am thankful for the sea, places, and people that improve my mood and make me feel alive, yet at peace. I promise never again take you for granted.
“I will lose weight.”
“I will quit smoking.”
“I will learn a new language.”
“I will be a better partner.”
“I will stop being an impulsive shopper.”
“I will get angry less.”
“I will smile more.”
“I will search for a better job, etc.”
“I will spend more time with my family and friends.”
You have all at least one of these New Year’s resolutions, right? I don’t know though how many of you actually keep your resolutions throughout the year? If you do, you have my salute! If can’t, please don’t worry. You’re not alone.
There is an alternative to the New Year’s resolutions it’s called a wish list that will not limit you to just the following year. It is something for your entire life. This long-term wish list is often described very well as the ‘bucket list,’ used in this text as defined in one dictionary: a list of the things that a person would like to do or achieve before they die. (Cambridge Advanced Learner’s Dictionary & Thesaurus © Cambridge University Press.)
“I want to climb Mount Everest.”
“I want to see the Great Wall of China.”
“I want to fly in a balloon.”
“I want to go on Route 66.”
“I want to read all the books in the world.”
“I want to sing on a big stage, even though I know I will never be a real singer.”
“I want to be a great cook."
Did you ever make this kind of list? I know some of you have. I have too. Albeit for me, it is called, ‘My little book of happy things.’ When I started to write, I didn’t know the usage of the term ‘bucket list’, but it is actually my bucket list in a form of a little book. As time passes, I come up with more and more things I want to do. If you do not have such a list yet, please take your time and write it down. The list can be endless. Whatever one puts on one’s bucket list is personal, and is going to fulfill one’s life to the fullest. Look at the list and commit to it.
Don’t look at it only as a ‘To-do’ list, but more as a personal guide for a happy, meaningful, and fulfilled life. Each time something from the list is done or achieved, the satisfaction will grow. Your life will gain a deeper meaning. Your life becomes richer. It doesn’t necessarily have to contain big things. I encourage you though to think wider. Don’t let the possible barriers stop you.
Write everything down as if you are sure that it is going to happen. As if, you have a magic wand in your hand. Day by day, month by month, year by year, mark down what you have fulfilled. Feel free though to constantly add any additional wish or goal that comes to your mind. Little by little achieve them. Don’t postpone things. Don’t leave until tomorrow what could be done today. Tomorrow may be too late. Live today to the maximum and plan tomorrow’s potential and use it. Make it, so you have no regrets. Yes, some things will require more time or money, but so long as your desire is strong enough, there will always be a way. Trust me!
Having a bucket list doesn’t mean that you will not allow spontaneity in your life. It simply means that you choose what will be the main things you want to experience in order for you to feel you’ve lived a full life. The other things will just give additional color tinges to your life. Don’t live in black and white. Let the colors fill your life. The more you live as you desire the more the colors of your life will get sharper and brighter. Living like this will leave no space for regrets. Never stop believing in your dreams.
"I really enjoyed reading this book. And, I suspect all fans of the Self-Improvement genre will love having a nibble on this one also! LESSONS in LIFE: Achieving a better you through self-reflection, is a very well written life improvement book. This book is intelligent, wise and packed to the rafters with practical common-sense advice. It becomes very obvious as you read through this page turner that the author is imparting her wisdom and understanding as to what happiness and success really means. It’s an excellent guide for putting things into perspective.
Profound thoughts are explained here in the simplest of terms. That's all I can say about this book. It is difficult to write a more objective review because the impact the author will have on you will make you see life and its problems in a wise and practical way. The book should NOT be read - it should be absorbed and reflected upon.
This book has helped me clarify my thinking, process my feelings, and make better decisions. If you are you ready to stop drifting and design a life you love, this read with help you on your journey. The author has put her heart in the pages of this book and will encourage and give hope to the reader. So many wonderful and courageous people share their experiences through books, and I thank this author for sharing hers.
The overall tone was simply imparting knowledge, personal experience and wisdom in a gentle and generous way. Her words will help to better equip you to interpret and handle life in a whole new way, which in turn will bring peace, love and joy into your life. If you are looking for inspiration and encouragement in the face of serious issues, this would come highly recommended from me.
No matter what your situation is today, this book will put you on the right path to better things. I’ve been around the block a few times myself and even I found this read to be very insightful. This wonderful new book will show you how to properly tune into life and the simple rules you must follow to achieve this. This by far is one of the best Self-Improvement books I’ve read in a long time. The author must be commended for her time and effort for producing such an insightful book. Also, the writing style is friendly which makes for an enjoyable read.
LESSONS in LIFE is a wonderful read that will leave you feeling like a better person for having read it. It's an impressive work for author Nico J. Genes and I'll certainly be looking forward to reading more from her in the future. I would highly recommend this perceptive and intuitive read. A well-deserved five stars from me.
Read review HERE
I have once read an article saying, based on a conducted study, that children raised by lesbians turned out psychologically better than children raised by "traditional" parents. The study was conducted for a period of 25 years following closely children of lesbians who were born using artificial insemination. These children, compared to children raised in "traditional" homes, turned out to be happier, more social, less aggressive and manifested less anxiety. Although the study was funded by gay and lesbian rights groups, the head researcher insisted that the data were not altered in any way. To help reduce potential bias, all the measures were scored using quantitative/number measures.
I think LGBT community will, in general, agree with the conclusions and I think that the majority will not think in any way that there is any subjectivity to it. On the other hand, I am sure that while some will remain neutral, a big part of the “traditional” world will think differently with more or less polite comments.
This wasn't the only study and I didn't come across any information that could lead to any other type of conclusion. There were few surveys that stated that oftentimes children in the same-gender relationship are more likely to face social and emotional problems. Despite what many straight people think, there is no indication what-so-ever that there could be any danger or big difference for the child to have two moms, two dads or a mom and a dad. No matter of sexual orientation the big factors I see could be reduced to the parent's role, the society's acceptance and the child’s take on the situation:
Are you ready to go through all good and bad?
Are you sure you have what it takes?
Yes? Then get ready before you embark the journey. Enjoy the parenthood. :-)
No? Make sure you are okay with the decision, have no regrets and enjoy your love life at maximum.
Life teaches us lessons continuously. Do we pay attention and acknowledge what we learn? Do we strive to improve ourselves, hence our life, relationships and by this positively influence everyone around us?
Life's an ongoing process. We should decidedly stop for a moment and reflect upon any major situation that happened. Could we do it differently? What did we learn from it? Should we change something in order to have a different outcome next time?
Do you want to change your life, but don't know where to begin? Are you in a relationship but you aren't happy? Do you feel lonely? Can you imagine what your life would be like if you discovered what made you feel fully alive? Are you stuck in a job you don't love? What's stopping you from having the life that you thrive for?
Life's a roller-coaster. Let's make it a genuine fun by finding and offering only the good within us. As odd as it sounds, it takes an effort to be a good person. It demands self-awareness. It requires perseverance. It takes keeping an open-minded over things and an acceptance of everything that it's different even if you don't manage to fully understand. Though at times it requires something as simple as only a honest smile.
Be good! Do good! Smile! Find the better version of yourself!
"In hope of a world, that does not celebrate the fake & the cold
In hope of a world where true emotions can be uphold
In hope of a world where truth is told
In hope of the world where sugar coated abuses are not sold
In hope of a world that does not force you to fit in & fold
In hope of a world where tears are allowed to unfold
You are not told to fake happy when your heart can no longer hold
In the hope of a world that doesn’t go numb & cold,
While faking positivity & not being bold
In hope of that world where you & I can be true to our core
We are not judged for being human
And not expected to be a bot, running on a computer code
Let the beauty of true emotions and the warmth of real unfold
Sweet, sour, bitter, happy, sad, high, low, cold
Sincere bonds and true connects
Let us not turn the world into a fake emotion(less) zone"
by Vanashree Yadav